International Talk Like A Pirate Day

Day 351: Ahoy, mates! Today be International Talk Like A Pirate Day, and if ye think I be tellin' a fib or 'avin' a little fun wi' ye, ye'd best be Googlin'. Fer th' occasion, I'll be bringin' ye a Special Edition o' 365 Caws an' addin' to it o'er th' day. 'Oist th' mainsail, lads! We're off on a adventure!

Set ye down, me buckos, fer 'ere's th' tale ye've been a-waitin' t' 'ear, o' th' day the Black Blade pirated th' Interceptor. Aye, ye might not be knowin' o' that vessel by th' name wot she's called today, but I be tellin' th' truth of it when I sez she were th' same tall ship wot once sailed under command o' that Cap'n Jack Sparrow lad ye might o' 'eard of. Fer the nonce, she be th' brig Lady Washington, an' on a fine, fair day at end o' August, she left port o' Kirkland t' wage in battle ag'inst th' topsail ketch, Hawaiian Chieftain, th' Black Blade among 'er passengers.

There were some thinkin' an' strategizin' goin' on in me 'ead, fer th' Black Blade allus likes t' be on th' winnin' side. Would not be a-furtherin' me career as pirate if I be sunk untimely. Aye, I'd be needin' to take measure o' me chosen vessel's crew an' cap'n afore makin' a move t' seize 'er. I be a-bidin' o' me time 'ere, innercent as newborn babe, an' plottin' th' whiles as crew goes 'bout they duty. We put out right smartly, an' cap'n none th' wiser that 'e 'ad a pirate in 'is midst.

Seas were calm on that day an' wind barely breathin'. Two mile out, we sighted th' foe bearin' down on us, 'er sails coaxin' all possible speed out'n the fiddly breeze, unfortunate at our disadvantage. She come alongside us an' got off two volleys wot did us no 'arm, but our cap'n couldna bring our guns to bear 'fore she were out o' range o' anythin' but pow'ful curse-words wot the crews was flingin' one at t'other heavy. We stood apart from 'er as wind died an' left us both dead in th' water. Then, as luck would 'ave it, our sails filled an' 'ers did not. We came 'round sharp an' cap'n cried, "Down 'er length, Madame Gunner!" Cannon an' swivel brought t' bear, the Chieftain 'ad not a chance fer another single shot as we peppered 'er repeatedly wi' fire.

Th' battle over and th' ship sound an' whole, th' Black Blade whispered a few sweet an' pointed words in cap'n's ear an' the man stood down an' let me 'ave th' tiller. "Let bloody crew sort it out amongst 'em," sez I, "an' th' Black Blade takes best o' the spoils. 'Tis a pirate's life fer me! Yo-ho!"

She be a square topsail ketch, th' Hawaiian Chieftain, fer all th' good it did 'er when she sailed inter battle wi' us on this day. T' be sure, she 'ad th' advantage o' first two shots fired, but then th' fickle, fiddly wind went dead calm an' left us both standin'. T'were nought cap'n could do save wait, an' when she rose ag'in, th' wind favored us. Our gunner brought swivel and cannon t' bear an' ne'er gave 'er a chance, though t' give 'em credit, 'er crew were a valiant lot 'neath 'eavy fire. But on this day, 'twere the Interceptor...beggin' yer pardon, the Lady Washington wot was the victor. Bring the grog topside, lads, an' give them as met Davey Jones in this battle a 'earty "Huzzah!"